SMSTSS 30: Planet Hulkusagi!
by ocramed
Summary: The Hulkusagi, aka Sailor Moon, and the Red Hulk team up to retrieve a powerful artifact, only to wind up on an alien world! Special appearance by the characters from the Avengers, SG1, Ranma 0.5 and Heavy Metal...DONE!
1. Chapter 1

**SMSTSS 30: Planet Hulkusagi! – By DS Wynne**

* * *

**Disclaimer: SM, R1/2, ST, Hulk and other properties belong to their respective owners.**

**Note: This is a multi-genre, three-part story.**

**Special Note: This story is based upon the upcoming "Planet Red Hulk" storyline in Marvel Comics.**

* * *

**Part 1**

* * *

_Meet Usagi Tsukino, the once and future "Sailor Moon"._

_Meet Thaddeus "Thunderbolt" Ross, the now and then "Red Hulk"._

_Although they disliked each other for what they stand for, they did share ONE thing in common: Dr. Robert Bruce Banner, aka "The Incredible Hulk". In the case of Usagi, she had been captured by a future, evil version of the Hulk, and subjugated to a series of experiments that turned her into a Gammazon, sometimes called "The Hulkusagi". Over the years, Usagi attempted to cure herself, but has mutated further, resulting in the development of multiple gamma-enhanced forms. Eventually, the Moon Princess gave up on the idea of ever being normal again, and simply uses her form mainly as an excuse to go wild, usually in the form of engaging in marital bliss. Still, as the Hulkusagi, Usagi has had her share of related enemies which definitely complicates her life. In the case of Ross, his beef with the Hulk stems from the fact that the Hulk's "birth" came under his watch, during a Gamma Bomb test, and that the creature is romantically involved with his daughter Dr. Betty Ross, the future "Red She-Hulk". In an effort to get final revenge on Banner for ruining his career, Ross accepted the help of one of the Hulk's enemies to become "Red Hulk", as a means of fighting Banner on his terms. In the end, Ross failed in his attempts to exact vengeance, and would have been charged with treason, if it hadn't been for Banner cutting a deal with the Federal government. Nowadays, Ross serves as "the muscle" for the latest incarnation of the Avengers, while performing those duties that the government deem too hostile for their usual band of "super-soldiers", meta-humans who work directly for SHIELD…_

_Nevertheless, what would bring two people together, when the only thing that binds the two is their involvement with the Hulk?_

SHIELD Headquarters: Triskelion, New York.

In the middle of New York's Hudson Bay lies the artificial island of Triskelion. For years, it served as the base of operations for the "Supreme Headquarters International Espionage Law-enforcement Division", or SHIELD, and continues to do so to this very day in the age of super-powered acts of terrorism. However, that is not why Major General Usagi Tsukino (USAF, SGC Commander) was called upon to pay SHIELD Director General Steven "Commander America" Rogers a visit…

"I have to work with General Ross?" Usagi asked with disdain. These days, Usagi works as the director of Stargate Command (SGC), where she supervises the construction and monitoring of the Stargate Network under the auspice of a secret international agreement that is maintained by the International Oversight Advisory, while maintaining a working relationship with the System Lords, the Jaffa Free Nations, the Asgards, the Ancients, the Ori and many other species who uses the Stargate Network on a regular basis. Usgai's role is a part-time position, due to the needs of the Federal government, such as now…

"Yes, you do," Rogers replied. "I would have requested Dr. Banner or Ranma's help on this one, but Bruce can be temperamental as the Hulk, and Ranma is already…detained."

"Yes, I know," Usagi replied. "I woke up this morning with him sneaking out of the house, so that he could participate on a 'diplomatic mission' involving the Amazons of the Island of Victoria Specialis, so that we could secure more ore for construction of additional Stargates…"

Pause.

"Am I right?"

"Er, yes," Rogers said, as he broke out in a sweat. "Nevertheless, the mission that I have for you and Ross is mission-specific…"

Rogers dims the lights and activates a holographic projector.

"As you know, we are trying to replicate the Zero-Point Module, the same one that powers the Stargate Network and the City of Atlantis. I need not remind you that such an artifact could easily solve America's energy needs, and could go a long way in powering our ships."

"No, I read the report of the 'Zeds', sir," Usagi replied. "I assume that there has been some success in that regard?"

"Correct. The United Nations Intelligence Taskforce—UNIT—had a research station located on the dark side of the Moon, where one such module was being constructed without prying eyes."

"What do you mean by 'had', sir?"

"This morning, we lost all contact with the research station. Initial telemetry has indicated that there was an explosion on the research station."

"Wait. An explosion from a Zed would have knocked the Moon's orbit out of whack."

"And that is explains why we have this situation…"

Commander America changes the images of the holographic generator…

"Whatever caused the explosion created a spatial anomaly," Commander America said. "However, what is left of the station is partially engulfed by the anomaly. Further telemetry readings have indicated that the only working Zed is within that anomaly…"

Commander America ends his presentation.

"Due to the unstable nature of the anomaly, I can't risk sending a retrieval team into the affected area, due to the anomaly's affect on the local area, including the fact that it is spewing high levels of exotic energy, like gravitons, cosmic rays and even gamma rays. And I cannot request help from certain individuals like Superman without making the Zed construction known…"

Pause.

"Therefore, your mission is to recover the Zed and any other documentation that survived the explosion."

"Well, the parameters of the mission do explain why you're sending me AND General Ross," Usagi replied with a nod. "Ross is a former test pilot, as well as a former member of the US Air Force's defunct 'Tactical Air Command', and that means he is psychologically prepared to undertake a dangerous mission…"

Pause.

"And I happen to be ME."

"Don't put it like that, Usagi. You already astronautically certified, and you have a special operations and black operations background. Plus, I know that you'll keep Ross in line."

"So, who will be the mission commander?"

"Since Ross is retired, you'll be in charge."

"Sir, you know that Ross doesn't like taking orders from subordinates, even if he isn't in charge."

"Agreed, which is why I have been authorized to give you a temporary pay upgrade to four-star. For the duration of the mission, you and Ross will be partners."

"Gee, thanks."

"Don't mention it…General."

Later, at Area 51, Usagi prepares to leave Earth for her mission, albeit unmolested…

"Oh, this is great," said Dr. Daniel Jackson, as he chuckles while Usagi loads up her gear into a cargo bin. Jackson was the resident xeno-linguist and archeologist for SGC.

"What?" Colonel Cameron Mitchell (USAF, SGC, SG-1) asked. He would be the one to pilot Usagi's craft into the anomaly.

"Fearless leader got shanghaied yet again," Jackson said. "I like having peace and quiet, anytime Usagi is not around."

"Don't you have something better to do, Jackson?" Usagi replied.

"No, I don't think so."

"Humph."

"Well, we're all set," said Colonel Samatha Carter (USAF, SGC, USS "George Hammond"), as she hands Usagi the manifest for the mission. "The 'Hammond' has been modified to deal with the increase levels of radiation and gravitons, as will Cameron's craft."

"What is so special about this particular mission to warrant such a risk?" asked Teal'c, a Jaffa who was the liaison between SGC and the Jaffa Free Nation.

"Well, as you know, we've been working on ways to replicate the means of creating a 'Zero Point Module'," Usagi said. "Well, we have one less ZPM to make."

"Really?" Vala (an alien adventurer and con-woman) asked. She happened to be the host of a System Lord named "Qetesh", which she didn't want to be, but did so in order to placate the followers of renegade System Lord Ba'al, leader of an alliance of rogue humans (called "The Trust") and disaffected Systems Lords (called "New Mind") known as the Praxis Alliance, into standing down. There were many, particularly amongst the Jaffa Free Nation and the Tok'ra (the Gao'uld primary rivals), that felt that the Systems Lords should have been eliminated. Usagi would counter that if the Tok'ra's founder, Egeria, could change for the better, so could the other System Lords, which was proven to be correct as evident by the fact that the most powerful System Lords were allies of Earth…

"Really," Usagi replied. "My partner and I have to retrieve it, should it still exist."

"Then why can't we send an SG team to retrieve it?" Mitchell asked.

"Unfortunately, the radiation levels of the anomaly are so high that normal shielding methods will be ineffective," Usagi said. "I…I happen to be prepared for such an occurrence."

"Ah, you're talking about your green persona."

"Precisely."

"Well, I do find your physiology most fascinating, ma'am," Carter replied. "But, is there a cure for your condition?"

"Nope," Usagi said. "Besides, I've long since accepted my…condition as a part of me."

"So, where is your partner?" Jackson asked. "He isn't here-"

"He is now," said a deep, looming voice from behind.

Jackson turns around to see the Red Hulk standing behind him. Red Hulk stares down at the archeologist with his glowing, yellow eyes while folding his arms. He wore a pair of black pants that seemed to fit on his person…

"How did you-?" Vala asked in surprise.

"Unlike the normal variety, I can manipulate energy," Red Hulk said. "Light is a form of energy, as is sound."

"Which is how you were able to circumvent normal means of detection," Carter said, as she nods her head.

"Great, everyone is here," said General Jack O'Neill, director of Homeworld Security, as he and Commander America walk up to the assembled group. Everyone, save for Teal'c, Vala and Dr. Jackson, snapped to attention.

"At ease," Commander America said, as he hands over a secured, metal brief case to Usagi. "You have your mission-specific protocols in place, Usagi."

"Thank you, sir," Usagi replied.

"Does anyone have any questions?"

"I do," Teal'c said, as he stepped forward.

"Ah, Ambassador Teal'c," Commander America said. "What is your question?"

"Is is true that you have fought over a thousand men in a single battle?"

"Um, pardon?"

"Teal'c is a fan of Earth's historic warriors and their ethos, Steve," O'Neill replied.

"Oh, I see. Well, I do recall taking on Nazi Germany's elite guard, HYDRA, in a single evening near the Rhine. Although, I do admit that Usagi and our allies in the Invaders did most of the work by preventing reinforcements."

"No way!" Mitchell said, as he turned towards Usagi, and looked at the Moon Princess in awe. "You fought alongside of Commander America?"

"Ranma and I did, actually," Usagi said. "Our mission was to prevent the Thule Society from summoning extra-dimensional entities to help the Axis. Unfortunately, we learned to late that Berlin had already sent an advanced battalion of HYDRA soldiers to facilitate the entities' arrival. So, Commander America took on the soldiers, while the rest of us dealt with the entities."

"But why did you leave General Rogers alone to deal with the enemy?" Carter asked.

"Because I asked her to, Colonel Carter," Commander America said. "Dealing with elite commandoes is a lot easier than dealing with demons that could turn the tide against the allies."

"Ah, I see…"

"But, that's history," Usagi said, wanting to change the subject. "I'm ready for the mission."

"General O'Neill, the Hammond is ready," Carter said. Even though she and O'Neill were together, she was also a military officer…

"Great," Red Hulk said with annoyance. "Let's get this mission over and done with."

"What's wrong with 'Big Red'?" Mitchell asked.

"He's just annoyed that I'm in charge of the mission," Usagi replied.

"Well, I'm annoyed that you're in charge of SGC, so I know how he feels," Jackson said with a grin.

"Humph."

"You better get ready, Bunny," O'Neill said.

"Just a second," Usagi said, as she closes her eyes a bit. When she opened her eyes again, they were glowing green.

"Hey, watch this next trick," Usagi said, as she explosively transformed into the Hulkusagi.

"Impressive," Vala said.

**Tbc.**


	2. Chapter 2

**SMSTSS 30: Planet Hulkusagi! – By DS Wynne**

* * *

**Disclaimer: SM, R1/2, ST, Hulk and other properties belong to their respective owners.**

**Note: This is a multi-genre, three-part story.**

**Special Note: This story is based upon the upcoming "Planet Red Hulk" storyline in Marvel Comics.**

* * *

**Part 2**

* * *

For what seemed to be an eternity, everyone, save for the Red Hulk, stared at the gamma-powered Moon Princess…

"Ahhhhh," Hulkusagi replied, before she checked her clothes. "My 'unstable' clothing seems to be intact…"

"That doesn't even make any sense," Jackson replied.

"Life seldom does, Daniel," Hulkusagi replied.

"I was under the impression that the Hulkusagi was…a savage," Red Hulk said.

"Only if the change occurs on its own," Hulkusagi said. "If I initiate the change, then I'm in full control over this form."

"Well, just don't lord your superpowers over us," Jackson said.

"What? Can't handle someone like me?"

"I can't handle someone like you before THIS."

"Humph."

"Does it…hurt?" Carter asked, as she took out her Tricorder to examine her friend's condition. "The change, I mean."

"Not since the first time, Sam," Hulkusagi replied. "When the changes occur, I get a massive increase of adrenaline that tackles the pain and pleasure receptors. It…kind of feels nice and orgasmic."

"I see…"

"In spite of this…monster form of yours, you still have my loyalty, Moon Princess," Teal'c said with a nod.

"How sweet of you, Teal'c," Hulkusagi smiled.

"Alright, let's go," O'Neill said, as he clapped his hands. "We have a schedule to keep."

"Hulkusagi, Red Hulk: good luck to you both," Commander America said with a broad smile.

And so, the mission begins in earnest…

Hours later…

"We're in position for launch," Carter said, as she sat in the main control room of the USS "Hammond", named after the Jack O'Neill's predecessor General George Hammond. "We're already picking up stress vectors and increase levels of radiation, so we can't get any further…"

"I got it," said Mitchell, as he prepares for launch. His transport was heavily shield, but not the payload he would be carrying.

"We are ready for launch…"

Down in the cargo hold, two gamma-powered behemoths waited in the cargo bin.

"So, Ross, how's going?" Hulkusagi asked, as she checked her space suit (also made from unstable molecules.

"Stuff, Tsukino," Red Hulk groused. "If it hadn't been for your interference, I would have retired from the Air Force with Banner's scalp."

"Look, I understand where you're coming from," Hulkusagi replied. "But I believe in redemption, and I believe in Bruce's, even if HE doesn't."

"Why? Because you have a kid by him?"

"That, and the fact that if Bruce doesn't think he is redeemable, he becomes a tyrant in a future apocalypse. And since I don't believe in pre-emptive assassinations, I hope that my involvement in his life will change him for the better."

"And thereby prevent him from becoming a tyrant," Red Hulk said, as he nods his head. "I understand your propensity to feel sorry for 'milksop'."

"Humph."

"Launching in five, four, three, two, one...GO!" Carter commanded.

Mitchell's modified interceptor is launched from the launch bay of the Hammond with very little fanfare, and begins its trip to the affected area of space that was unstable, thanks to the accident of lunar-based station…

An hour later, the pair of Hulks is on the station, while Mitchell was attempting to keep station.

"Man, I hate to be in THAT," Mitchell commented, as he observed what was going on. The station was based upon the look of the International Station that was in Earth Orbit, except on a smaller scale. Parts of its solar panel arrangement were virtually obscured by tendrils of energy that danced about the station. Furthermore, it appeared to be phasing in and out of space visually.

"It's no wonder a retrieval team was not sent in," Mitchell said. He then checked his sensor readings again.

"Sam, I think there is something odd going on. I'm sending you the data on my readings…"

On the Hammond, Carter examines the sensor readings that were being fed to the ship.

"Interesting," Carter said, as she looked over the telemetry. "It appears that the flow of time within the anomaly is different outside of it."

"That does explain why the time dilation effect we've been experiencing…"

Pause.

"Just like Asgard Prime."

"Correct," Carter said, referring to the fact that she and others of her crew experienced fifty years within the span of five minutes, when the planet of the Asgards, a race of aliens who inspired the Norse mythology with their interaction of the gods of Northern Europe. "As far as we know, years may be passing, and we wouldn't even know it…"

Meanwhile, within the anomaly…

Red Hulk woke up from what seemed to be a hangover of some kind.

"Huh?" Red Hulk said, as he realizes that he had gotten caught up in some web. He just hoped that there weren't any giant spiders around to harass him…

"Ohhhhh…"

Red Hulk turned towards the source of the sound, and saw Hulkusagi stirring. She, like him, was also tangled up in some sort of webbing. He also noticed that she didn't have her space suit on. In fact, Hulkusagi appeared nude. If he was a younger man, he'd be affected by her apparent beauty, which is a good thing since he, like her, was also nude.

"You okay, Tsukino?" Red Hulk asked.

"I guess so, Ross," Hulkusagi said, as she examined herself. "No wonder it feels breezy around here…"

"Well, what the hell happened to us?"

"Apparently, we got caught up in the anomaly," Hulkusagi struggled. "This web seems to be made from some sort of resin similar to Spider-Man's web-shooters."

"And our clothes?"

"Phased out of existence, I guess. So much for unstable molecules…"

"So, how are we to get out of our predicament?"

Before Hulkusagi could give her answer, she and the Red Hulk were greeted by flying insect riders: two males and a female. They appeared to be primitive in style and dress, and appeared to have their spears at ready, and were light-gray skinned in color. In fact, other than skin color and under arm webbings that looked like skin flaps, they appeared to be humanoid.

"What are they saying?" Red Hulk asked. "I can understand them."

"I can't understand them either…yet," Hulkusagi replied. "But, from their mannerism, it appears that either they think we are trespassers, or we are 'the catch of the day'."

"Oh, great, we're dealing with cannibals."

One of the flying insect riders leaps off its riding companion, and prepares to spear the Red Hulk. However, Red Hulk manages to break free at the last minute, and swats him away.

Meanwhile, one of the females throws something at Hulkusagi, which felt like hot water to her face.

"Gah!" Hulkusagi said. She looked at the woman and growled.

"That wasn't nice," Hulkusagi said, as she took a deep breath, and exhaled with sudden force that she and her companion were knocked out of the air. Sufficiently angry now, Hulkusagi pulled herself free, and allows herself to drop to the ground, where more warriors begin to converge upon on her position.

"Oh, boy," Hulkusagi said, as she smacks her hands together. This action creates a concussive wave that bowls down the warriors. She then raises her left foot about a foot off the ground, and then stomps, creating a small quake that knocks down the rest of the attackers.

"Who wants some more?" Hulkusagi said confidently. She then heard some braying to her rear. She turns and sees something that was a cross between an elephant and a Middle Earth Mountain Cave Troll, but with lots more tusks, and twice as big. On its back was a canopy of some kind, where a powerful man and his entourage sat looking amused. He claps his hands, causing all the activity of the impromptu battle to cease. He then points to Hulkusagi, and says something to her…

At the same time, Red Hulk lands next to Hulkusagi.

"What's the situation, Tsukino?" Red Hulk asked.

"Not sure, but he appears to want me for something."

"Obviously," Red Hulk said with a smirk, noting Hulkusagi's lack of clothes. "So, you're the mission leader, what's next?"

"I recommend caution, and play along with these folks for the time being. Our goal should be to assess situation, and then go from there. We still need to find Zed. Can you still sense it?"

"One moment," Red Hulk said, as he closes his eyes…

"Yes, I do, but the energy signature is feint."

"Just as I thought," Hulkusagi said, as she nods her head in reply. "The Zed DID get caught up in the inter-dimensional shift. Question is: where is it now?"

"We can ask this guy," Red Hulk said. "You know, the head muckity-muck."

"Precisely. I'll allow myself to be…entertained by this guy, and you watch my back while using those amazing abilities of yours to pinpoint the location of the Zed."

"I'm touched. You think this guy will try something to you?"

"I'm sure of it," Hulkusagi said, as she takes a look at the muscular man. "I've worked 'black ops' before, and had to, well, 'take one for the team'."

"I bet you hated such assignments."

"Not really," Hulkusagi replied. "When I went into 'black ops', I was taught how to compartmentalize for the sake of a mission. If an agent is unable to do so, either they quit, or they get corrupted. It's even harder for a woman to go into black ops, since we, as a gender, thrive on emotional connections. Guys, on the other hand are typically visual, so it's easier for them to separate love from lust from us ladies, although that is changing a bit."

"Humph. If you were my wife, you wouldn't be doing a man's job."

"Well, if you were my husband, you'd be Ranma. Oh, wait, you're not, so shut up."

"GRRRRR!"

The man on the alien pseudo-pachyderm yells something at Hulkusagi and Red Hulk as he pulls out a carved blade of some kind from his belt.

"Follow my lead," Hulkusagi said, as she raises her hands. She then looked directly into the man's eyes.

"We give up!"

"Harrumph!" Red Hulk said, as he follows suit.

The man smiles in triumph, as smacks his chest with his left fist.

Ten minutes later, the pair was in chains, although Hulkusagi was placed near the chief being attended to by the chieftain's women, while Red Hulk was dragged along by the chief's warriors.

"I hate you, Tsukino," Red Hulk said, as he limped along. "I really, really do."

"Don't tell me about your problems, bub," Hulkusagi huffed. "You don't have to deal with this guy in an intimate way, you know…"

Meanwhile, back on Earth…

"You drive a hard bargain, warrior," said Queen Erotika, ruler of Amazons of Victoria Specialis, as she gave Ranma a backrub. "Cousin Hippolyta was correct about your…negotiating skills."

The Amazons of Victoria Specialis, unlike their more mainstream sisters, were dedicated to the art of love in all its interpretation, as a way of winning the hearts of Patriarch's World. That did not mean that they were lacking in the warrior ethos. On the contrary, they skills were suited for more subtle methods of warfare that could be seen as similar to the ways of the shinobi…

"Eh, I have my moments," Ranma shrugged. "But we do have a deal, correct?"

"We do, warrior," Erotica said. "You pay me a visit one weekend a month, two weeks during the summer, for a single lunar year, in exchange for mineral rights thereafter."

"Cool," Ranma said contently. "My superiors will appreciate that-"

Suddenly, Ranma felt chills running up and down his spine.

"Huh," Ranma said aloud. "Odd…"

"Anything wrong, warrior?" Erotika asked.

"Um, nothing," Ranma said, as he appeared to be relaxed again. "Just thinking."

"Ah," Erotika said, as she began to kiss Ranma's back.

However, Ranma's mind was in a whirl.

'The only time I get tingles running down my back, is if I sense the presence of a cat, sense the presence of Mr. Popo the Black Genie, sense the presence of Old Greg…or Usagi is caught up some mischief again…'

Pause.

'Looks like I have to find out what nonsense Usagi is up to…again…'

**Tbc.**


	3. Chapter 3

**SMSTSS 30: Planet Hulkusagi! – By DS Wynne**

* * *

**Disclaimer: SM, R1/2, ST, Hulk and other properties belong to their respective owners.**

**Note: This is a multi-genre, three-part story.**

**Special Note: This story is based upon the upcoming "Planet Red Hulk" storyline in Marvel Comics.**

* * *

**Part 3**

* * *

_Samantha Carter's interpretation of the time dilation within the spatial anomaly was proven to be correct. For every second that passes on Earth, an entire day passes within the anomaly as well. So far, as far as everyone else is concerned, both Hulkusagi and Red Hulk have been gone for only an hour. From the perspective of the pair, they have been away from Earth for nearly ten years. And since their arrival to their home for many years, a lot has changed in the intervening years…_

Red Hulk wakes up, feeling a sense of déjà vu, as he realized that he was bound by a rack.

"Grrrrrr!" Red Hulk snarled, as he realized that his massive strength was being sapped by the "Chain of the Titans", a set of chains that had been forged by magic to keep really strong beings in check…

"I swear, if I get out of this, I'm going to-"

"Ahhhh!" yelled a familiar voice.

Red Hulk looks down from his perch towards the source of the scream. Apparently, he was on top of an Aztec-style pyramid…

"Now, we give this woman to Lord Uhluhtc, who will grant our people power to rule over all peoples here on 'Er'th'," yelled a light-blue skinned priestess, as she wore her mask while barely covered in her tribal garb. She stood before a sacrificial stone alter, which faced a reflecting pool. As the priestess chanted her words, the skies crackled while the pool bubbled…

Meanwhile, Hulkusagi struggled to free herself from her bounds. Her strength was also bound by the Chain of the Titans, not to mention she was still suffering from the effects from a powerful drug that could kill even the greatest warrior. She and Red Hulk had gotten leads on the location of the ZMP (or Zed) in the Lands of Never-where, only to be tricked while being a guest of the priestess-queen Mari-Lyn. Now, she was to be sacrificed to some powerful entity, who could easily tip the delicate balance of this savage world of Er'th amongst the various tribes, clans and kingdoms. That was why it was important to recover the Zed before its power could be properly harnessed.

In the mean time, the two Hulks had to get out of their present predicament.

"What a fine specimen you are," Mari-Lyn chortles, as she touched Hulkusagi's stomach, as she felt where she would plunge her ceremonial dagger. "Such a vessel of power should be given to the god of gods of our world…"

"Um, no thanks," Hulkusagi said with a nervous grin. "I like to keep my insides where they are…"

Hulkusagi, like any other Hulk, had near-instantaneous regenerative prowess. If one manages to atomize a Hulk, all they need to return is sufficient amount of gamma radiation in order to reconstitute his or her body, something that even a Kryptonian or Daxamite, all of them with the powers of the much-vaunted Superman, could not do. Still, she wasn't going to find out if she can regenerate her heart with a primordial god around. So, it was time to get ghost.

"And now, Uhluhtc, accept our gift to you-!"

"RRRORRRWR!" Red Hulk roared, as he lands down to the base of pyramid. His aura glowed while giving off massive amounts of heat. Pieces of hot metal were embedded in his arms, neck and shoulders.

"How could you free yourself?" Mari-Lyn exclaimed.

"Trade secret," Red Hulk replied. He didn't want to tell the priestess-queen that unlike the green variety of Hulks, the madder Red Hulk gets, and the hotter he becomes. So, while he couldn't break his chains due to the enchantments, he could melt though them, using his anger towards his predicament as the catalyst…

"RRRAARWR!" the Red Hulk said, as he smashed altar, freeing Hulkusagi in the process. He then grabs Hulkusagi, and dives into the reflecting pool.

"After them!" Mari-Lyn yelled, before her henchmen dived into the pool after the two Hulks.

Meanwhile, Red Hulk swam while carrying Hulkusagi on his back. He could see an underwater drainage system up ahead, and swam for that, narrowly escaping an awakening primordial horror. Fortunately, Mari-Lyn's henchmen were not so fortunate…

"Ack!" Hulkusagi said, as she coughed up some water. She looked around to see that she was in some grotto of some kind, where the waters ran by and over a cliff in the form of a waterfall. She looked up to see a large opening that allowed light to shine through, allowing exotic fauna to grow. The place reminded her of the underground gardens of Regula, a planetoid, located in the Mutara Sector, which served as a proving ground of sorts for the so-called "Genesis Project". The project was to allow the Federation to turn "dead worlds" into thriving eco-systems within hours. The project was briefly shelved for a period of time after the Khan Incident, until more suitable protocols could be established to enable safe usage of the Genesis Device…

"You don't need to breathe, you know," Red Hulk said, as he sat away from Hulkusagi, while looking up at the opening to the grotto.

"Habit," Hulkusagi replied. "Well, that went well…"

"You shouldn't have risk yourself in getting the next clue as to the whereabouts of the Zed," Red Hulk said.

"But we got the clue, Ross," Hulkusagi replied. "According to that crazy Mari-Lyn, a group of hu-mons passed through the area several cycles ago, while we got caught up in forging a kingdom or two together…"

Red Hulk nods his head. He had defeated the chieftain of the people, called "The Wasp Riders", in honorable combat for Hulkusagi's freedom, and was made leader. It was around the same time that the Wasp Riders rivals, the yellow-skinned "Worm Riders" attacked. Thankfully, Hulkusagi's experience on the alien world of Arrakis, also known as "Dune", gave her the insight to control the great worms. Impressed, the Worm Riders made Hulkusagi their leader. With this development, the two Hulks remained with their respective peoples until a lasting peace could be made in the area known as the Hidden Valley of the Larvae. During their stay, both Hulkusagi and Red Hulk learned the ways of Er'th, and even the major languages. They also learned that Er'th exist in a pocket dimension that transects nearly every point in Time and Space, where there are worlds rich in life. Occasionally, a rift would open up, allowing both sentient and non-sentient life to enter that world, and Earth was no exception in this. However, this time, the rift to Er'th was caused not by natural cosmic forces, but by the mishap on the station where research on the creation of more Zeds was being conducted. Nevertheless, once peace was achieved in the Hidden Valley of the Larvae, Hulkusagi and Red Hulk moved on to the Land of Neverwhere, where they hoped to find more clues to the missing UNIT team, and the prototype Zed, was last scene. The problem is that due to the time differences between this dimension and Earth's, decades have already passed on Er'th for the missing UNIT team. Still, at the very least, retrieving the Zed was top priority…

"Yeah, well, we're still far from completing our mission, Tsukino," Red Hulk said. "And perhaps, maybe the boys back at home on Earth think we're dead or something."

"Why would you say that?"

"It's been nearly ten years since we've arrived on this misbegotten world. Bad enough my military career is over; now, I'm trapped on a world far from home, with no one that I even know…"

Pause.

"Once again, I blame Banner for this."

Hulkusagi sighs, as she realizes that Red Hulk had some layers underneath his rough exterior…

"And for that, I'm sorry," Hulkusagi said, as she places a hand on Red Hulk's shoulder. "You have my word that I will complete this mission, and get us home. But, in the mean time…"

Hulkusagi began kissing Red Hulk's neck, causing him to bolt upright.

"What the hell are you doing?" Red Hulk said suspiciously.

"I want you to keep me company tonight," Hulkusagi said. "Is that too much to ask?"

"But, you're married-"

"Ross, it's been almost ten years since I've seen Ranma, and we have an arrangement of sorts, if either one of us want to bunk with someone for the night."

"In other words, you and twinkle-toes are swingers."

"And what of it?"

"I'm a traditionalist."

"Are we living a traditional life?" Hulkusagi countered. "Heck, we're dressed like we belong to a world drawn by Frank Frazzeta or some other sci-fi/fantasy world. And you weren't so 'traditional' when you had many a fair maiden over the years."

"That's…different."

"It's not. My marriage vow is with Ranma for life. For tonight, I want your company because you saved my life, Ross. Is that too much to ask?"

"And what about tomorrow? What then?"

"Then there is tomorrow, and we move on. But, if you can't be mature enough to deal with an adult situation, then perhaps you should sleep alone tonight. But, you can't say that I never offered you anything."

Hulkusagi then moves away, and lie on the grass with her head down.

"Goodnight, Ross," Hulkusagi said, as she prepares to sleep. However, a few minutes later, she felt Red Hulk's hands on her body, even as she felt kisses on her neck.

"You've changed your mind?"

"Well, only for tonight, Tsukino," Red Hulk replied. "And we never speak this moment again."

"Whatever helps you sleep with a conscious, I guess."

"We're not going to do much of that."

"No, I guess not," Hulkusagi said, as she turned to accept Red Hulk's embrace…

The next morning, Usagi yawned, until she realizes that she had changed back to normal.

"Huh?" Usagi said, as she looked at her arms and legs. Her warrior garb was not ill-fitting, forcing her to tighten it around her smaller frame. She then turns to see a sleeping older man with gray hair and a gray handlebar mustache. The fact is that whenever the Red Hulk reverts to normal, he re-grows his mustache, which was weird.

"Ross, wake up!" Usagi said, as she shook her lover to awake.

"What?" Ross said, as he stirs. He then sees Usagi, and wakes up.

"Gah!" Ross replied. "Tsukino…YOU-!"

"Yes, and take a look at yourself," Usagi said.

"Me?" Ross said, as he sees himself. "We've changed back!"

"Obviously," Usagi said. "The question is why-?"

"We can answer THAT," said a felinoid, as he and other "animal men" surrounds the pair. "But, we won't. For now, get up, hu-mons!"

Usagi and Ross were forced to their feet.

"So, what happened to us?" Ross demanded.

"Our master, Lord Ard, has learned of the two strangers who are looking for the Zee'Em'P, the fabled power that can grant a man power over other men…and a god power over gods…"

Pause.

"So, he created this talisman to destroy the monsters that you two are, but keep the hu-mon alive," the felinoid said, as two of his men presents two identical devices that look like spheres that were sitting over game consoles. One glowed red, while the other glowed green.

"Ross, those are energy siphon devices," Usagi said.

"You're right," Ross replied. "The Leader used something like that to collect the energy needed to combine cosmic energy with gamma energy."

"I remember that," Usagi said, thinking about the ill-fated "World War Hulks" fiasco, when the Leader created an army of red hulks to take over the country.

"Move along, before we have to hurt you into compliance," the felinoid said.

"We're going," Usagi said, as she stumbled a bit. "Besides, I'm curious to meet this…Lord Ard."

And so, Usagi and Ross are escorted across the desert towards the mountains, where they see a floating castle tucked amongst the snow-capped mountain. Unknown to all, they were being followed by Mari-Lyn's spies…

"Ross, look!" said Usagi, as she wrapped her fur cloak around her person to protect herself from the cold. "You recognize the exhaust ports?"

"Yes, I do," Ross replied. "It's the exhaust ports for a typical heli-carrier."

"Bingo. And considering what they are being used for, then it is possible that what's keeping it afloat is a Zed."

"Then our boys are still alive, then."

"Not necessarily, but we'll see…"

Soon, they are presented to Lord Ard, as he lazily sat on his throne surrounded by his animal men. Some of his court were female in nature, and were dressed seductively.

"Oh my god!" Usagi exclaimed. "You're a 'furry'!"

"How dare you call Lord Ard of the Castle-In-The-Sky a mere 'furry'!" said Ard angrily. Ard had white hair, and wore clothes fit for a Roman Caesar. But most importantly, there was something familiar about this person…

"Did…did you just make an anime reference?" Usagi asked.

"Um, no," Ard said nervously.

"No, you just did- wait a minute, I know who you are!"

"Who is this clown?" Ross asked.

"I remember reading the crew manifest of the Lunar-One Station. There was a young genius named Francis Aardvark, a REAL otaku from what I hear."

"You mean, this clown is a…NERD?" Ross chuckled.

"This 'nerd' built all this, after I came to this world with one of the station's primary lab," Ard yelled. "When the main power generator went critical, it was MY genius to utilize the fold system to jettison the lab to safety."

"Except that the lab went through a thin membrane of space, and ended up here," Usagi said.

"You know about spatial phasing?"

"I've hung around enough aliens to get the gist of faster-than-light travel…"

Pause.

"But to do all this…it amazing, you know."

"I was the last of the team to survive long enough to construct an entire castle around the lab, using the ZMP for the basis of the power. And thanks to a mixture of magic and science, I created my 'animal men' from the remains of my dead crew men…"

Pause.

"I have created a kingdom of my own, and from here, I shall united this planet under my rule!"

"Well, as impressive as all this is, we've come to take the Zed back to us, and you with us," Usagi said.

"I don't think so," Ard said with menace. "You see, with you two here, you are going to help me to create my empire with your technical skills and military tactics. And since I know that you two are gamma-enhanced beings, it was a simple matter to siphon your energies, rendering you normal."

Pause.

"Face it, there is nothing you can do about it-"

Suddenly, there was explosion all around.

"Sire, we're being attacked by the people of Neverwhere!" said a bird man, as he comes running into the throne.

"It's that cursed witch-queen!" Ard yelled. "Sound the alarms-"

"I know that my prize is in there!" yelled Mari-Lyn, as she yelled while riding on a giant wasp just outside of the defense parameter. "Give me back my prize, man-of-science!"

"I'm not ready!" Ard yelled. He desperately turned towards Usagi and Ross.

"You got to help me!"

"No," Ross said.  
"And I am with him," Usagi replied. "Unless, you give back our powers."

Ard growled, but nods his head in reply.

The containers that held Usagi's and Ross's respective energies were smashed on the ground…

"Arrgh!" Usagi yelled, as she felt the sudden rush of power into her system. She had to maintain her calm; otherwise, her gamma-side could go wild. Ross fared no better, as he and Usagi changed…

"RRRAARRGH!" Hulkusagi roared. "Hulkusagi free now to SMASH!"

With that, Hulkusagi leaps out the window to confront Mari-Lyn, leaving Red Hulk to deal with the ground forces…

"Hey!" Mari-Lyn yelled, as she fell off her flying companion, even as Hulkusagi began to pound the witch-queen into the side of the mountain.

"Hulkusagi SMASH!" Hulkusagi roared.

"Is that a fact?" Mari-Lyn said. "Before I came here, I had forged a pact with Uluhtc, with the promise to return you him as a prize. Now, feel MY power!"

Mari-Lyn's form changes into that of a giant, multi-tentacle creature, which wrapped its tentacles around the gamma-radiated Moon Princess.

"I SHALL PERSONALLY CONSUME YOURA FLESH!" Mari-Lyn-octo said.

"Hulkusagi not like that!" Hulkusagi said. "Show pervert witch true power! Moon Prism SMASH!"

Gamma Sailor Moon appears, dressed in her Sailor fuku.

"What magic is this?" Mari-Lyn-orichi said.

"Hulkusagi is Sailor Moon, champion of Love and Justice! In name of Moon, Hulkusagi SMASH!"

And Gamma Sailor Moon proceeds to do just that, which ends when she heals Mari-Lyn of the influence of her master Uluhtc. Later, she and Red Hulk would finish the job by destroying the ancient enemy for good…

Later, back in real space, USS "Hammond" detects increased activity from the spatial anomaly.

"Mitchell, do you see something?" Carter asked.

"I see something coming through," Mitchell said, as he maintained his distance. "Wait, I see…a castle."

"Pardon?"

In the castle, Hulkusagi maneuvers the thrusters, while Red Hulk stands guard over the numerous prisoners.

"You think we'll get medals for this?" Hulkusagi said.

"Probably not," Red Hulk replied.

"Bummer…"

With the castle and prisoners secured, Hulkusagi and Red Hulk completed their mission, although they were both surprised that almost no time had passed on Earth. Nevertheless, the mission was a success.

Later, back at home…

"So, I heard you had quite the adventure," Ranma said, as he drove Usagi back to their home in Colorado Springs, located near SGC.

"Yeah, I guess so," Usagi said, as she looked out of the car window. She was going over her thoughts of her ten year-sojourn with the Red Hulk. As promised, the pair swore to never tell anyone of what happened between them…

"Is there anything that I should know?" Ranma asked.

"No, Ranma," Usagi lied. "Nothing happened between Ross and me."  
"Humph."

**Fin.**


End file.
